I know following God is supposed to be full of faith, but I think I experience as much fear as I do great moments of faith. I know that I should be better and a great pillar of faith (as a pastor, for many, it’s the expectation), but I am a Christ follower just like so many of you. I have moments of faith, followed my moments of fear, followed by fear or faith…

The great thing is that the Bible is full of people who have the same struggle. I relate more to Abraham and understand his journey when I am trying to follow God in something he has called me to. You see Abraham having moments of great faith, followed by moments in which he trying to take things into his own hands, followed by another moment of faith, followed by another failure. Through all of it, you see God’s constant presence with a man who is doing his best to be faithful to what God has called him to.

What I am learning more and more is that when you are actively living out what God has called you to, the Scriptures make more sense. It’s easy to be critical of people who are trying to live by faith, when we aren’t living by faith. When we are walking in a life of faith, we understand their struggle and can find comfort that God met them in that as well. I am constantly learning that God wants me to struggle with diligence in times of faith and fear. It's in the struggle that I will be faithful to His calling in my life and have to trust that He will actually show up and meet me there.

20 days into the New Year and here we are. Is the year becoming what I want it to be? I’m amazed how quickly all my New Year resolutions change back to the old habits. Even the things that are changing seem to be holding on by a string. Most of us have this problem, don’t we? We all want to change but we don’t. Paul, one of the main authors of the New Testament, understood. He said, “I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate.” Isn’t that what we all say this time of year? Now the question for all of us is, “Do we give up or do we hang in there?” What if we just took one step today toward the dreams we had 20 days ago? The momentum it creates in our lives may shock us and ultimately be the one simple step that creates change. Let’s take a step.